How to hug

7 Jan


Yes that’s right, I’ve been practising my hugs!  I hug Nancy all the time, but one night as I hugged and sang to her at bedtime we had this absolutely magical hug.  It felt incredible – all warm and perfect and full of love.  I’ve just wanted to re-create that amazing hug ever since.

The other thing of course, is that now that I’m a Mum, I have to perfect the ‘Mum hug’.  Everyone knows that Mums can hug better than anyone else in the world!  I’m sure that this is a natural thing that happens between two people that care very deeply for each other, but I also like to think that there are things you can do to maximise the chances of a great hug.  Here are my findings having practised my hugs on Nancy and other family members over the Christmas period (!!)

1. Focus on the hug:  Banish all thoughts of anything other than your feelings for that person from your mind.  This hug is gonna show them just how much you care for them – oh yeh, it’s gonna be gooood, and it deserves your full attention.

2. Find the optimum arm position:  Position your arms around your huggee how ever feels natural – this (pretty hilarious) post has some tips on where to position your arms based on if you’re a man or a woman.  Personally I think you should just go for what ever feels right – based on size and comfortability.  Chances are you’ve hugged them before, so you’ll know what to do.

3. Apply a little pressure, but not too much:  This is a big one.  I have a huge issue with hugs that are too strong.  I think the best hugs are ones where both parties are relaxed.  It’s all about tenderness, so relax into the hug and pull them close to you lightly to show how important they are to you.

4. Enjoy that hug: A hug is a very special thing.  For a truly magical hug, it shouldn’t be rushed.  Close your eyes, relax into the hug and hold it for a few seconds.  The length of the hug kinda depends on your environment, the occasion and other external factors.  It that person is having a particularly tough time, you might want to consider giving them a long and tender hug.  Maybe add in a little back rub.  Ooh yeh, that’s good.  But if you’re meeting at a busy bar surrounded by rowdy football fans trying to get a pint, you might want to consider keeping it to a couple of seconds.

This might all sound very obvious, and silly. And it is. But you know what, just giving a little thought to your hugs can mean much better hugs for all involved, which can only be a good thing, right?


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